The DerfJam Chronicles

We're 4 games behind 1st place in bowling league and there's 12 games left in the season. I think we can take it. Last week, we swept the competition and tonight I hope we do the same. Tonight we play the last place team but you can't overlook anybody. The last time we played them, they took 1 game from us and it really hurt our confidence.

With 3 weeks left in bowling season, I'm trying to round up my friends to join me for next season. I don't wanna hop onto some random team again. This season I got lucky cuz the team that picked me up happened to be really good. So far, Richard is down to join and possibly Jay. Any other takers? I want next season to be really fun. Let's do this.

To make up for the fact that I ate some dairy the past few days, I've decided to give up soda for the rest of Lent as well. I noticed that I've been drinking alot of soda lately so that should even things out.

I gotta get back to eating more veggies and fruits. I kinda strayed away for a little but I'll be back. =)

So my Vegan Experiment failed. This past week was kinda tough and my will power was slightly weakened. When we were at my Aunt's viewing, the only food there were snacks like cheese rolls, hopia, toron, empanada, suman, etc. And we were there for like 5 hours and I got hungry so I ate some cheese rolls. FAIL. And then after the viewing we went to my Uncle's house and they had pizza and pasta and I ate that too. I ate the cheese pizza though. I still haven't eaten any meat. Only dairy.

Thanks to everyone for giving me their support and helping me be strong and trying to get me back on my feet. I'll be out of my cave soon.

I had to get away from all the things happening so I went out of town for the weekend. I was up in Pomona for Sportsfest with HTC. It was very therapeutic for me. I had so much fun that it made me forget about what was going on at home. I needed that because I was beating myself up inside. It was eating away at me. I couldn't take it. My state of mind was unstable. I was ready to cry at any given second. If someone mentioned something that reminded of the situation, I could immediately feel the tears begin to well in my eyes. Now I think I'm getting close to being normal. I could talk about the situation and still keep my composure.

But I still have alot of decisions to make. This whole ordeal made me realize that maybe I'm not spending my time wisely. Right now, I'm ready to abandon things that I've worked really hard for. I just don't wanna make any decisions based on emotions. I wanna cool off and let level heads prevail. I'm gonna spend a couple weeks away from all my extra curricular activities and weigh out their importance to me.

I need to escape reality for a few days.

I'm at work and I'm still crying. I just can't control it. When people pass by and ask if I'm ok, it makes me cry even more.

I'm eating everything in sight. I have no self control right now.

I'm feeling extra guilty cuz there were multiple opportunities for me to visit my Aunt in the hospital and I didn't. Last Saturday, I went to the club because I put business ahead of family. Last Sunday, I shot @ House Of Blues because once again I put business ahead of family. And on Tuesday I was bowling and I put myself ahead of family. I feel really selfish right now. Those 3 days, my whole family went to visit her in the hospital and I didn't. My priorities aren't straight. My family should be ahead of any of the things I do. And now it's too late. I realized that too late.

I really feel like giving up all the extra curricular things I'm doing. I need some time to get my head straight.

I got a call this morning from my cousin. He knows what hours I work and he wouldn't call unless it's super important....



I can't even cry anymore. I ran out of tears. My eyes burn from all the crying.



I don't even know how to deal with this situation. It happened last year and now it's happening again. Around the same time. We were gonna go and celebrate my Lola's one year death anniversary in a few weeks. Now my Aunt gets to go and see her again.

When the birds are chirpin', ask the birds what they're saying. Don't listen to the white noise in the background. Go directly to the source. It'll save everyone a lot of trouble.

Did I mention that I hate damage control?

I've been wearing a back brace all week. My back still hurts but not as much as before. I'm able to sleep better now. And this back brace really helps when I'm running. I've been running everyday when I get home from work now. And it's flat ground and it feels so much easier compared to that hill I used to do at work. I can run 2 miles and still feel ok. Before, half a mile was killer.

I've been stretching alot, even if I don't exercise. All my muscles seem very tight, especially my hamstrings. My back, calves, quads, and even my abs feel like I've done a rigorous workout.

I tried sleeping early last night. Like at 8pm. I kept waking up every few hours. It's hard to get a good night's sleep when you're in pain.

My friends have been telling to go get checked up. Last time I went to the doctor about my back, they told me to do all these stretches/poses/positions and asked me if there was any pain when I did them. It was stuff like "lift your leg forward keeping your knee straight" or "turn side to side", etc. But it wasn't anything painful. I could do all that stuff no problem. But when it gets to physical activity, that's when the pain kicks in. Also when I'm in a prolonged position like sitting down or laying down, I can start to feel the pain. But the doctors just told me to lose weight, since it seems like my body can't support the weight I was at. I know they're probably right and I'm working on that as we speak. So I see no point in going to the doctor yet. I just gotta deal with the pain for now.


Buying a house is a lengthy process. So far, I have clue on what the hell is going on and it's my bro handling everything. I don't wanna make him handle all that so I'm starting to read up on mortgages, down payments, loans, pre-qualify/pre-approvals and realtors and all that jazz that goes into buying a house. We already met with a loan officer and my bro did all the talking. I was just there. :(

Last night, we dominated the 1st place team. We took 3 of the 4 games. And we needed it. We're currently in 6th place for the 2nd half of the season(but 3rd place in overall) and we haven't won that many games lately. We have 4 weeks left and we need to go on a hot streak to capture 1st. I'm starting to find my groove and I'm hoping to keep that momentum going into next season. But for next season, I want to have my friends join me instead of me just hoping onto a random team like this season. So far Richard and Jay are willing to join me. We need a 4th person, but I don't know who's willing to bowl. Hit me up if you're down. Jay and Richard are good bowlers. Richard is probably the best out of us. And me and Jay are at about the same level. Don't worry if you suck cuz your handicap will make up for it.

I do have the highest score in the season so far. I scored a 264 a little while back on pure luck. But we do get prizes (I think cash prizes) at the end of the season, for those who hold records. That'd be sick if my team (X-Factor) goes on a hot streak and we end up getting first and I also get the league high score. I think we can do it. The 10 pin was my Achilles and I've learned how to control the "back-up" ball to convert it. And I was the one holding my team back. My scores are the lowest and we always lose by a few points. So now that I'm hittin' it, we're winning!!!

1st place team won 1 game last night so their total is now 32 games won. We won 3 games so we're at 20. 12 games behind with 16 games to play. GAME TIME!!!!

http://leaguesecretary.com/LeagueFilesStandings.aspx?LID=20433

Last night I went to dinner for a friend's b-day and it was tough. Being on this vegan diet, you need special treatment if the people you are out with aren't eating the same stuff as you. I hate that fact. I never really knew it until last night. It was a pain. They had to get out a separate menu just for me. I don't like being a hassle.

Another decision I have made is to eat whatever is being served on Apr. 3. That day is my Lola's 1 yr death anniversary. We're going up to San Jose to visit the rest of my family and gather together to pay respects to my Lola. And after last night's experience, I will be respectful to the rest of my family and eat whatever it is that is being served. I know I gave all this stuff up for Lent but this is a conscious decision I am making and I don't feel like I'm letting myself down for this occasion. I'm not making excuses just to eat meat, cuz I know I can do this vegan thing for as long as I want to. If I set my mind to it, anything(within reason) is possible.

I am also no longer gonna be running at work on my lunch breaks. Since the time change, I think that the sun will still be out at 630pm so I can run at that time. I've also been wanting to get back into playing basketball on a weekly basis. Me and my three younger cousins used to play 2 or 3 times a week and it was a good bonding session. Since I'm the eldest in the group, I talk to them about girls and doing the right thing and all kinds of random scenarios. I know they look up to me and I try to be a good example. I try to give them the best advice possible. I also like to play "no mercy" and take them to the hole strong. My brother did that to me and it got me to be better so I'm passing on the knowledge.

My back has still been hurting. I think it is one of two things: a herniated disc or sciatica. I'm leaning towards sciatica since I have felt this before and it's gone away after a few weeks. It's been about 2 weeks now and if it stays for a 3rd week, I'm going to the doctor. Maybe.

This morning I was ironing my shirt and I set the iron down. And as I went to flip my shirt over, something bad happened. I guess my shirt kinda got caught on the ironing board and I happened to knock the iron off the edge of the board. And if any of you know me, I have a tendency to catch things when they're falling. I dunno, it's just my natural instinct. I see something falling and I do my best to save it, regardless of what it is. I've smashed many toes and jammed many fingers trying to do this. But an iron is hot! Luckily it happened so fast and the shirt was still in my hand that I didn't see the iron falling. Otherwise, I'd be getting treated for 2nd degree burns right now.

Did I mention that I have the urge to fight people now? I dunno if it's my diet and me being irritated at the fact that I'm not eating what my mind desires, but my temper has been on a good one lately. Chemical imbalance? I haven't actually fought anyone, but if someone says the wrong thing...I'm ready.

So last night we had an online meeting, since everyone couldn't meet in person. So we're discussing our game plan for promoting and Barry asked where we wanna go to promote? Barry mentioned hittin' up D&B's parking lot Thursday night. But then Raul starts complaining that we can't even promote during the day so why are we even gonna try at night? He said we'd get arrested if we get caught puttin' flyers on cars. I jokingly told him to take one for the team. And Dustin says he'll even wear a ninja outfit and help him. This is all joking around. And then Raul gets all heated and then logs off.

So we're talking about other places to hit up and I suggest going to Conchings since I saw all these flyers on their walls and on top of their trash bins. And then Raul comes back and says thats a stupid idea. So I ask him what he suggests? And he starts saying that this is 1st grade shit. And then he stops talking to the rest of us for a few minutes. So we're discussing other places to hit up. And then we were talking about hittin' up colleges and puttin' shit up on bulletin boards and what not. Brea says her school is strict on flyers since "someone" bombed the place with flyers last time. So I told her what about going through proper channels and asking for permission to post stuff. This is where Raul comes back and says "WTF!!!!!!! You tell her to go through proper channels and you want me to take one for the team and get arrested!!!!!!! You think this is all a joke. I guarantee you would not last one day if you went out there and tried to do this shit!!!!!!!!!" And then he started going off saying this is why our shit is weak. No one knows jack shit and if it was up to him, he'd cut all our promoters.

I don't even remember everything that happened in the meeting cuz I was pissed. I don't have a problem with someone saying the things he did.....but he's never said anything like that in person. Every time we have face to face meetings, Raul is pretty damn quiet and doesn't really give too much input. But in online meetings, he's all high and mighty. He rules the world when he's behind a computer screen. He's the Internet Gangsta.

I'm thinking of taking Yoga or Pilates or something of the sort. I really don't want to get stronger but I want to be more flexible. I might just get those dvd's since I don't exactly have all the time in the world to go to these classes. My friend Drea offered to take classes with me, if I decide to go. It's a little bit of a motivating factor to know someone is willing to do it with me.

I went to bed at 10pm last night. I woke up at 4am feeling tired so I went back to sleep and woke up at 7. I still felt tired. Damn.

This vegan diet is kicking my ass....

8 hours of sleep in the past 48 hours. Some people get more sleep in one day than I do in 2 days. I think this should have been a New Years Resolution for me: Get an adequate amount of sleep/rest. I think I'm going to make it a priority from now on. It's the next step for me. Eating right, exercising, and now sleep/rest. I'm taking baby steps to realize what I need to do and how to get there. Better late than never.

Hahahaha. So I'm goin' the the Busta Rhymes concert tonight @ HOB to do some photo coverage. It's pretty dope that I'm getting to go to concerts for free in exchange for coverage. And I guess I'll also be writing a review of his performance for the Hundred Percent website.

I'm lookin' forward to goin' to a bunch of concerts.


I ran today and my back still hurts. It's not as painful as last week. I've been stretching every night and I think it's helping loosen it up. I think I should be back to form by next week. I can run now, but I just gotta fight the pain.

And if anyone happens to be friends with this girl, let me know cuz I want to get in contact with her.